Bad robots: The smart vacuum cleaner kryptonite in your home

Robot vacuums are better than ever, but they still have some everyday nemeses

Smart vacuum cleaner kryptonite
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Robot vacuum cleaners are brilliant. No, honestly - we're serious. Check out our pick of the latest and greatest robot cleaners to find out why.

But, while the newest robo vacuums are a lot more capable than their early generation siblings in terms of navigation and functionality, there are far from perfect. If anything is going to wrong in your smart home, and cause you chaos - chances are it'll be your robot vacuum cleaner.

Here are five everyday things that can wreak havoc for your supposedly smart cleaner:


Pets in general are an absolute menace in the robot vacuum world. Even on a basic function level, you'll find that pet hairs are one of the toughest jobs for a robot cleaner to deal with.

But it's when your pets go bad that your robo cleaner will go even, er, badder. Like when this Roomba spread dog shit all over his owner's house.


Dyson decided to go fat rather than thin for its robo vacuum - the thinking being that it's more important to get around and in between chair and table legs, than it is to get under sofas, cabinets and the like. Even Dyson, a company famous for 'disrupting', realised you can't have it both ways.

However, whether you go skinny or chunky, your robot will inevitably have the odd meltdown trying to escape your wicked furniture.

Rugs / Carpets

Rugs have had tassels since the Qashqai people added them to their Persian designs in the 11th century. Anyone who's spent 4 minutes researching "rugs with tassels" on Wikipedia will tell you that.

It's almost as if the Qashqai people didn't care that, a thousand years later, people would have to constantly untangle their robot vacuum cleaners from the loose edges of a living room rug. The selfish idiots.


Most modern robot vacuum cleaners have cliff sensors designed to stop them from toppling to their doom.

They don't always work though. Oh well, they only cost about £700.


My toddler is terrified of my Dyson 360 Eye. But I keep telling her, "He's more scared of you, than you are of him."

And that's because he knows what she's capable of.

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